I Hate It, Let’s Watch It

60. Riverdale S6E14 - Venomous

Welcome to yet another episode of Riverdale we hated (and watched anyway)! Were you disturbed by the weird threesome energy of that VeBArchie scene? Did you roll your eyes at the shameless retconning of Hal Cooper into an exaggerated caricature of what a serial killer would be like as a dad? And are you fed up with that spiteful old cow, Nana Rose? Well, you have friends here, because we said yes to all of those and we have MORE.
 
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59. Riverdale S6E13 - Ex-Libris

Normally, we stan a petty queen, but Percival takes his pestering to a whole new level in this week's episode of Riverdale by making it his mission to recover overdue library books. If we're being honest, we'd rather be charged with misdemeanor theft than be subjected to eczema bordering on leprosy, swampy ghosts of child predators past, or developing the venomous characteristics of a black widow spider, but no one seems to be able to tell Percival to fuck off, so that's what we get. Can someone take this guy out already? We're willing to sacrifice Jughead for the cause.
 
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58. 365 Days: This Day

We cannot overstate our adoration of this movie trilogy. It truly has everything we look for in a hate-watch: terrible dialogue, confusing attempts at a plot, enormous holes in the fabric of the story, and deeply flawed main characters who we are somehow supposed to root for. Just like its predecessor, 365 Days: This Day hits every single mark, and also THAT PLOT TWIST, Y'ALL!? The wild ride continues, and we're loving EVERY hump and bump (a wink-wink)! 
 
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57. Riverdale S6E12 - The Fog

Typically, we love the trope of "weird weather acting as a plot device," but this character-driven episode of Riverdale sadly misses the mark. Even though we finally get to address some of the forgotten plot points of the season, we're SO BORED by the predictability and repetitive nonsense that Riverdale is unfortunately becoming known for. With an impending apocalypse, our burning question is...do we even care anymore?
 
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56. Riverdale S6E10&11 - Folk Heroes & Angels in America

If we were chronokinetic, we would go back in time and stop this atrocious season of Riverdale from happening. From ever evolving superpowers to weird religious undertones, these two episodes are everything we hate, saved from being a total waste of time only by KJ Apa's abs. Apparently, the apocalypse is coming to Riverdale, but maybe not soon enough.
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55. Windfall

Take the money and run...is NOT what Jason Segel does in this movie. And if he had, he would have saved us all a lot of time. Maybe he couldn't run in those boots that were significant for some reason that is never fully explained? Or maybe he was on some kind of personal moral quest that would have made more sense if it had ever been revealed to us? This movie provides ZERO answers, and we have a MILLION questions.
 
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54. Riverdale S6E9 - The Serpent Queen’s Gambit

This week, we're actually in total agreement with Percival Pickens' plan to put an end to gang violence in Riverdale which either means we've officially gone crazy OR Percival's mind control powers work long distance. But don't worry, we still have plenty of complaints about Abigail's basket of cyanide scones, the deeply toxic relationship that is Veggie, and the return of Julien...
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53. Riverdale S6E8 - The Town

Here we go again, folks! It's time for Archie to rally "The Town" to save Riverdale for some inexplicable reason. But this is what we're doing, so we're here to help you break down Percival's clearly nefarious motivations, the dubious nature of the gang's  superpowers, the waste of time that is and has always been the Blossoms, and why opening a casino in a town historically plagued by greed, corruption, crime and poverty may NOT have been the best idea, VERONICA.
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