69. The Sand

If you thought that a movie filmed in 12 days on one beach with an undisclosed (probably shoestring) budget would be a big mistake, we're here to tell you that you're absolutely right. Flawed from the sand up, this movie posits questions it never bothers to answer, tries to get us invested in a love triangle with three of the most unlikeable humans known to man, and at the end of the day, REFUSES to explain what exactly the fuck is up with the titular sand. We recommend this film to anyone who wants to feel smart, because every character in this movie is a next level idiot except for the undisputed savior of this otherwise complete disaster, Beach Patrol Alex. Please sign our petition to get this guy his own movie.

 

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